As adults living in a harshly competitive world, we all know that we cannot have the cake and eat it too. We must give up the good for the great. Nothing is free in this world.
We sometimes face turning points where we need to consider giving up on what we have accumulated so far. So that, different doors open before us. We may end up in a place in our careers where we question our decisions and the road we have been walking on. Some of us may be thinking if the career choice we made was the one we hoped for. Also, whether we have wasted our efforts and time all along.
As a millennial in the middle of such a questioning time period of my life, I can completely relate to this kind of stage and understand those of you who experience similar thoughts and feelings. You may have a job and a social circle that comes with it. But still, it may feel unfamiliar to you. You may lack the sense of belonging or at least fulfillment in your surroundings. Therefore, you may have an urge to change it all. Yet, the fear of taking the first step and discovering new horizons do not come as easy as it seems.
So how should we proceed? What to do in order to overcome the fear of change? Let me show you some steps I personally follow.
Fundamentals of Overcoming the Fear of Change
1-Accept the fact that change is necessary
Accepting the fact that the change is necessary to move forward is the key for commencing the change phase. If you complain about how your house is cold in winters, you need to acknowledge the fact that you need to move to another one with better heating. You cannot just sit there complaining about the situation and expect a miracle to happen. Not realizing the need for change can jeopardize your future by stripping away all the opportunities ahead. Therefore, the first meaningful action is acceptance of the need for change to get out of the dead end street.
2-Identifying necessary steps to follow for the change
Realizing the need for change brings the question of “what to do next in order to make that change happen?”. Knowing the steps to take on this road and being prepared for the outcomes are what make the procedure conceiving. If you finally decide to move to another house because of a heating problem, it is necessary to determine what to do after that to find another house without such a problem. You will have to come up with a plan with time frames stating all the steps needed to be taken.
For instance, you will need to start looking for houses satisfying your needs through different channels. Then, you will have to arrange for the moving and settling phases. This is the part where you need to be organized and systematic with your thoughts and actions with a definite deadline (of course with some flexibility along with it because not everything goes as expected).
If you don’t take organized set of actions you will get lost in thoughts. And they will transform into concerns that will then turn into anxiety and stress. The most important and essential point is to know is that small steps make big difference. One small tiny step to commence all that is the most crucial part.
3-Monitor the outcome to see if the change is reflected
After implementing all the necessary steps, it is time to monitor the outcomes to see whether the change is achieved according to the expected outcomes. If you have moved to another house and don’t have the heating problem anymore, it means the change you have gone through is successfully complete. If not, then there must have been a problem during the second step and you need to investigate that.
4-Accept the fact that you cannot have it all
Change is an inevitable part of life and we all have to embrace when it is time. What the most crucial point here is that sometimes we need to give up the good we hold in order to receive something better.
Continuing on the example above, if you have a conveniently big house in a good neighborhood but with a heating problem, you cannot keep on shivering just because you have some positive aspects of it. You need to stop getting cold because it will effect your long term health. You may need to give up on the size or the nice view. But moving to a warmer house will save your health. Realizing this and taking actions to change the situation is not always easy decision to make especially if you have been living in that house for long time. However, it is VITAL to give up the good for the great for the future to be brighter.
Coming back to our focus as career decisions, just focus on the long term benefits and gains when making a decision to change your situation. If your job is safe and paying well but you are constantly drained and not satisfied by your work, you have to accept the fact that it will not help you grow. You are killing your own spirit just because you cannot stop thinking about what you will lose instead of what you will gain.
Life is all about making decisions and changing situations in the expense of losing the good in pursuit of greater.
Welcome change as a realistic friend, not a pessimistic enemy. Don’t forget we are giving up the good for the great.